About Christmas

All I can say about Christmas is THANK YOU!

A Winter's Walk

As I finished off another cookie, after eating a countless number of them, I sat back in my recliner and smiled as I gazed out the window on this snow covered December day. I thought to myself, how wonderful it is to be alive and enjoy the beauty that the season brings forth! The idea of comfort and joy filled my senses and I literally forgot that I ever suffered or that I ever would.

I, then, considered alternatives to the uncomfortable thoughts that I had been plagued with over the last few weeks. The thoughts, stimulated by the side effects of medication and remembrances of my transplant and neck fusion, had overcome my rational mind and allowed me to feel unwell and incomplete. So, I put on my long johns and a heavy coat and went for a walk that ended in a three mile jaunt! I was able to do it  because of my decision over twelve years ago to challenge illness. While recovering after the two life changing surgeries, I made myself, no matter how bad I felt, take a walk. The weather conditions didn't matter.  I told  myself that I was tough and I could do it.

There are many things in my life that I still need to overcome and do. I have been postponing change because of uncertainty. I am happy to know that this week I have several coaching sessions that will encourage me to continue pursuing my hopes and dreams. I keep my dreams alive as they keep me from yielding to what afflicts me.

On this winter's day I envision continued healing and moving forward undaunted, appreciating my many blessings. I thank a winter's walk for my renewed capability. It shall serve as a memory of comfort and joy and the resiliency of the human spirit.

I call upon you to take a winter's walk and create a memory of comfort and joy for yourself. Consider challenging what afflicts you. You deserve such a beautiful gift.

I Believe

Walking through the departments stores there were signs everywhere that said, "Believe." Tis the season to believe in those unseen magical ideas that we have all come to know and love regardless of our faith and/or because of it. There's a part of everyone that wants to believe that, no matter what, everything will be okay and everything is magical.

Here's an idea for the week. Believe this will be your magical season leading to a magical year where everything is okay. Believe in magic. Believe all is well. Believe it and tell everyone you know to believe it too. When whatever is ailing you strikes out, tell it you only believe in wellness and miracles.

Maybe if we all believe all is well, then, it will be. Give belief to your friends, your coach, your loved ones, and believe together.  When my doctors, family, friends, and I believed I would be well after having to experience a heart transplant, I was and I am! It works.

Just believe...

Embracing December's demands

Here we are, in the midst of the hustle and bustle of the holidays, with our minds busy planning what all has to be done. And, if your like most, there is plenty! So, with all we have to do there are a few things to keep in mind, or, better yet, ask yourself everyday.

1. Am I taking my medications like I'm supposed to?
2. Am I resting enough?
3. Am I forgetting anything or anybody?
4. Do I need to speak with my coach?
5. Am I being financially responsible?
6. Am I drinking too much?
7. Add to this list the questions you know will be beneficial to you.

I guess my wish for you during this busy holiday season is to remain empowered, aware, and proactive in all you do. It's a time when it's easy to do too much. Be alert as to what you can tolerate mentally, physically, and emotionally and create a mindset that will allow you to be fully in charge of your well being. How better to show your love?

So, embrace the season's demands and be merry.

Believe

I'd like to share this quote by Albert Einstein:

"It is better to believe than to disbelieve. In so doing, you bring everything to the realm of possibility."

Allow me to share a life changing experience that proved to me the power of my belief. After my heart transplant most of my thoughts revolved around thoughts of sickness and inability. There was no joy in my life. However, I noticed that I was healing, and that gave me the thought that, perhaps, I could get better? Thus, I started to believe. And the more I told myself I would be okay, the more I was, and the more I believed I could be. My outlook changed as did the realm of possibilities. I went from victim to victor by simply believing.

Let us not forget the power of our words to ourselves. Let us adopt a belief that empowers us. I challenge you, this final week of November 2011, to bring all your thoughts into the realm of possibility be believing.

I believe you will...

Remembering to give thanks

This upcoming week is when everyone will gather together and give thanks for life's blessings.  We are collectively supporting one another with our message of thanksgiving and gratitude. However, there exists the effects of illness and suffering that demonstrate how hard it can be to rise above it's negative forces. Blinded by pain, troubled thoughts, and medications, gratitude and well being seem obscure. Voices will remark, "I'm not in the spirit."

Let me offer this: There exists a force that is much stronger than any disease that awaits our awareness of it's presence -- and, it is good. By simply forcing a smile, repeating that word of thanks and gratitude, and looking for that which brings light, will be all you need to alleviate that negative force. Just think of that favorite Thanksgiving treat!

So, start right now and say thank you for all that you know and all you have learned. Say thank you with gratitude as many times a day as you can for this entire week. Tell your coach, friend, or family member to remind you. And, tell your pain, your troubled thoughts, and your medications, that you are grateful for them too, because of what you will learn from their part in your life. Ultimately, it's all good for the knowing.

Happy Thanksgiving!

To laugh

Have you laughed yet today? Visualizing your world where there is no laughter is sad. Visualizing your world consumed with joy and laughter is invigorating, refreshing, life enhancing. Take a minute and visualize each: a world without laughter -- sickness, hunger, fatigue, sorrow...  Now, take a moment and visualize a world with laughter -- sunshine, joy, health, gratitude, friendship, love... Which do you prefer?

A well known coach sent me a 'gem' in the following quote:
"Sometimes the best helping hand you can get is a good, firm push."  Joanne Thomas.

Today, I push you to laugh...
                                  out loud, with friends, to yourself, or, any ole way!

Navigating November.

An acquaintance told me how unbalanced life felt due to the anxiety of the upcoming holidays.  The normal flow, although always interrupted by the side effects of medication, pain and not feeling well, has become a surge of more to do with less time.  What can you do, not only to feel less anxious and overwhelmed, but also, to meet your expectations and stay healthy, rested and joyful?

Here's a few thoughts that have proven helpful especially for those with a medical condition:

1. Change the expectations you put on yourself. For example; if your family is used to certain traditions, start something new that is very creative and festive. Anything new is exciting and you might get a pleasurable response, not only from others, but also, in how it empowers you.
2. Challenge yourself to be so ABLE in the midst of hindrances that your mantra becomes: "I will prevail!"  Say that a hundred times a day and see what happens.
3. Keep a supply of high energy foods around and talk to your pain rather than medicating it.
4. Exercise and be SELFISH when it's time to REST. Just do it!
5. Know you are powerful.

And, talk to your coach for inspiration and support.You are the captain of your ship. Is smooth sailing in store for you this November?

Navigating November.

New Blog Site

After experiencing some difficulty with this blog site, I have decided to change it to a new account that will work better with my website account. Please go to www.considercoachingnow.wordpress.com for the newest blog entries.

New blog

The blog has moved!

http://considercoachingnow.wordpress.com/

Traveling

Without a doubt, travel is necessary.  Deviating from a regular schedule to take a trip often causes anxiety, confusion, and fatigue. When dealing with a medical condition, the change in routine is relevant because you are already predisposed to precarious health. One thing to remember is to take charge!

By taking charge, you are empowered.  You remove negative consequences by realizing what triggers symptoms, like, not enough rest, sleeping irregular hours, too much activity, and irregular meals. So, the second thing to do is make a plan. Have a conversation with a coach, friend, or relative who can help you devise a strategy.

Third, review your plan. Make sure you have all your remedies in place, a strategy for your self care, and anything else you will need to overcome distress. This clears the way for you to finalize the travel arrangements without distraction.

Finally, relax and  have a great time knowing you are in charge of your wellbeing!

Staying Balanced

During this Fall season, along with remembering to rest, might we also consider how to stay balanced? What can you do to add a sense of balance along with your daily activities? When dealing with medication side effects and not feeling well, along with daily responsibilities, it's difficult to remember to keep a restful spirit and maintain balance. And, what does balance feel like?

Balance is stability of body and mind. In today's terms we tend to think of stability as money in the bank, a nice home, a good job, and healthy relationships.  If any of the above are missing, then there is an imbalance in our harmony and equilibrium. How can we rest when this happens?

Remember this, when we feel that there is unrest and imbalance happening in any moment of our lives, it's because we are forgetting that we have the power to change any dynamic that may be occurring by simply stopping, stepping away from the situation, realizing what our inner dialogue is, and consciously changing the thought process. And, if that isn't enough, call your coach, a family member, a minister, a friend or a neighbor to add a layer of support. I sometimes silently chant things like: I am stable in body and mind, I am balanced, I am harmony and equilibrium! Try it -- it works.

If you can think of anything else tell us...

A challenge to rest

Does anyone get any rest these days? Why is it that no one believes it's okay to rest?  I know that I feel more relaxed, more confident, and more alert with plenty of rest. I'm pretty sure that's true for everyone, whether dealing with an illness or not.

Is resting a choice? Do we have to push ourselves to limits that challenge our ability, health, and well being? I don't think we do. So, for this first week of October 2011, I challenge you to incorporate the concept of restfulness into your daily activities. Approach the week with a restful spirit. Listen to your body and stop and rest, if only for a few minutes, to honor it's need to slow down and relax. If life, the job, or a relationship gets overwhelming, just take a few minutes to shift into restfulness. Then, see what happens.

I encourage you to have a restful October...

Consider this...

As it is now, to be an organ donor, you opt in and it's displayed on you driver's license.  In many countries in Europe, it is assumed you are an organ donor unless you opt out.  The statistics show that there is a decreased wait time for organs when needed for a transplant if this opt out method is in place.

The conversation is ongoing as to the best way to handle organ donation. Either method, opt in or opt out, allows you to make a choice as to whether or not you will be an organ donor. The question becomes should we allow people to opt in as we have now in the United States or use the European model of 'opt out' which assumes one is a donor unless he/she opts out?

Are you an organ donor?

A Learning Life?

Sometimes in my awareness of disease and its ramifications in my life and in the life of others, I want to believe there is something worthy in it. Going through the daily emotional turmoil and discomfort has to mean something doesn't it? People say it builds character or it teaches lessons. Others say it is a result of our dis'ease' with who we are or, even, that we willed it upon ourselves. And, there is the belief that it brings us to a belief in God, a source greater than who we are.

We all suffer at some point and get sick -- meaning that no one is immune. Seems safe to say that there is learning as a result. It's the essence of the learning that one has to examine. And in the examination of your condition, whoever you are, what are you learning? Who are you becoming as a result? Perhaps therein lies the answer as to why.

Call it a learning life? This awareness of illness, pain, and suffering? I suppose the ultimate 'knowing' will empower you, if only to 'know' you don't want illness any longer. Wow, that's a powerful change of perspective...

September 11, 2011

I listened to the announcer as he described the chaos of 9/11 when the planes crashed into the World Trade Center in New York City and an overwhelming feeling of fear overcame me. That knowledge that there are circumstances in this world that we have no control over and, yet, have lasting effects on our lives. Terrorism/Illness/War. We ask ourselves, how can this be?

With few answers as to why, I wonder, how do we cope with these circumstances? Until those answers are revealed, I offer support, caring, and understanding to persevere. What more do we have then each other and our own concepts of God?

Please take a moment to share your thoughts and coping strategies as I believe we will all benefit from your contribution. Thank you and be well.

How do you prepare for doctor visits?

When it's time to visit your doctor, it's easy to come up with questions and write them down, but, do you take them with you to your appointment?  Is your doctor aware of your concerns and worries? Do you have all the information you need about your diagnosis?

Clearly communication with your team of health care providers is essential for wellbeing. Having over eleven years post transplant, all details matter, and you as the patient must be proactive. I still communicate with my coach prior to my scheduled appointments for clarity and focus. Try to ensure you have someone in your life to help you.

There are many ways to prepare for an appointment that I haven't mentioned. This blog is the perfect place to learn and share information. Remember that sharing important life enhancing suggestions is a great way to empower your life. Take action.

What matters?

Because it's happened to me I know it's happened to you. How? Because we are all connected. That's why nurses and doctors listen to you when your not well. That's why families gather around when your not well. That's why we are sad when someone we love is not well. That's why we get fearful when a Hurricane threatens our safety or a diagnosis threatens our wellbeing. It matters that we are okay.

Struggling with life and not feeling well can leave you disconnected because what's happening to you is scary. When I learned of my heart condition, I was overwhelmed with a grief that consumed my being and I thought of nothing more. The disconnect threatened my sanity. I isolated and there was no one else that mattered. I became a victim of my diagnosis.

Your diagnosis may be terminal or benign, you may or may not have pain, you may or may not have ability.  But, unless you have amnesia, you do have the ability to remember what matters. And, that is that we are all connected. You need only to remember.

Just think about the School Bus Driver who drives the kids to school, the Policeman who helps keep us safe, the Shopkeeper who sells the products we need, the Pharmacist, the Doctor, the Nurse, the Teacher, the Psychologist, the Trucker, the Garbage man, the Coach and the whole gamut of people who keep us connected. We all need each other and what one doesn't need today, they will eventually need one day.

In my darkest hours what mattered was that knock on the door when someone came to visit, that phone call asking how I was, the nurse who attended to me and the doctor who spoke of plans to heal me. What mattered was the looks of concern and caring. I recognized that no one, no matter who they were, wanted me to be sick. And, to you who are suffering, there is no one who wants you to be ill.

So, think about everything that matters to you and share that here so it may remind someone else who matters...

How do you deal with your pain?

In an effort to live the best life possible with a medical condition that is a source of pain, I found it necessary to 'outwit' my pain. I know people do this on a daily basis by finding ways to alleviate their discomfort.

Of course, consistency and a regular schedule minimize the degree to which pain accumulates. We all know that taking medications as prescribed, eating right, exercising, and getting a good nights rest will make one feel  better, but, the truth is its not that simple. There are too many factors that interfere. Often, it's the pain that causes us to stray off a healthy regimen. And, too often, it's the actual pain medication that adds a layer of additional misery.

Since my transplant in 1999, I discovered ways to be manage my discomfort by keeping records, researching the topic, and challenging myself. My pain is now minimal because of time and how I outwit it on a daily basis. 1.) When I first wake in the morning, while lying in bed, I cover my eyes with the palm of my hands and slowly massage my head with my fingers for about a 2 minutes(I learned about this from a guest on the Dr. Oz show).;  2.)  I tell myself that I am about to embark upon a spectacular day filled with learning and adventure in an effort to create a mindset for the day(this creative visualization varies on a day to day basis).;  3.)  I do some stretches by stretching my legs from side to side, etc.(be aware that any stretches you try should be performed appropriate with your diagnosis and ability).;  4.) I dismiss any thought of pain and continually reinforce that  with affirmative sentences like: "I am healthy, whole, and complete."; 5.) Throughout the day, I use cues to alert me of an onset of pain. Cues are individual and require action after becoming cognizant of them. Intertwined with cues I utilize self talk which is effective in confronting the pain and making it manageable.; And, 6.) Stay active with goal setting, interactions with family, friends, and a coach to help alleviate the emotional effect that pain has.

Please share any ideas you may have to overcome pain in your life. Your words can be transforming to others.

Do tell...

Dealing with fear--what can we do?

Lately I've become aware of some underlying fears that are dominating my movements. I've known about these fears and have chosen to ignore them because to face them, well, then, I would have to be proactive and do something about them. Does that sound like you?

For me, I know it's time to have a look at my fears and see what can be done.  In a way, doing nothing keeps me in this little sphere where I can be negative, lazy, fearsome, and changeless. A favorite excuse has been my transplant and the side effects of my medication that cause my anemia, bone loss, and digestion issues. These issues, like for many of you, are a daily occurrence for me and require a lot of energy to contend with.

'Fear' leaves us all paralyzed, and, for some odd reason, comfortable in such an ungodly place. And, while in that place, we spread our fear to our family, our friends, our neighbors, our community, and to everyone we meet. The next thing you know everybody is shifty eyed, anxious, afraid to express themselves, awkward in manner, and exhausted. I've recognized the need to express myself through thoughtful communication, confidence, eye contact, and with positive clarity. Couldn't we all benefit from that?

So what can we do? I decided to try a strategy that has worked for me in the past and I invite you to see if it will provide any benefit for you. To begin, I start by identifying each fear, becoming clear on why I have the fear, weighing the options I have to dispel the fear, and considering the consequences of any actions I may have to take. I spend time gathering information and becoming informed. Then, I talk with my coach and others about replacing my fear with something positive, workable, life-enhancing, and responsible. Then I take action and make a change.

With the process outlined above in mind, I hope dispel three of the fears that are prevalent in my life right now. I believe this is one way to try and I ask that you share what works for you.

Do tell....

Are you having issues posting your thoughts on my blog?

I am aware that some of you are having difficulties joining and posting on my blog. We are working to make it easier for you to access it. Please email me at mwuyak@gmail.com with any issues you are having so we can address them. Thank you .

How do you cope with your circumstances?

This week my goal is discover how we, meaning everyone who comes to this site, can overcome the difficulties prevalent in life with grace and style while discovering within- that untapped source of strength and forbearance from which to call upon.

I have spent the last 11 plus years navigating through the results of a heart transplant trying to comprehend the hows and whys. On a daily basis, like me, people are dealing with issues that leave them shaken and lost. You wake in the morning with no hope, purpose eludes you, and in pain from not feeling well, what are you to do? Or, maybe you care for someone who feels this way, how do you cope?  With this bitter knowledge, you are still cognizant enough to understand that you are alive and have to function. Herein lies the challenge--the call for answers--the call for strength...

"How do we cope when it all seems pointless, too much, hopeless?"

The question consumed me for years and even now resurfaces only to remind me that I am still here, still breathing and still functioning. It took some time, but, one day a shift came. I decided to look at my circumstances as a challenge. I decided to accept the challenge and endeavor to find answers. I pretended I was watching a movie in which I was the primary focus. I had to write the script as I went. I became fervent and focused with my mission. As the forces of discomfort, medication, and disability tugged at me--I became fierce and loyal to myself and my goal. I found a reservoir of ability within and discovered its depth. And, when it didn't seem deep enough, I knew enough to pray. With pray, once again, awareness came.

Now, in my journey, there is only growth.

How about you, do tell....

Spontaneity - Are you spontaneous?

     Seems like as we get older or are on a structured schedule, we are unable to let our instincts take over and allow ourselves to do something out of the ordinary. What is that? For months a little voice within me was asking me to  fly to another city and visit a very dear friend. The voice even told me to surprise her and just show up. I have been wanting to see my friend as I have missed her very much. Life's problems, tasks, and expectations kept getting in the way.
     Did you ever notice, though, that the little voice always gets its way? Well, last Wednesday I found out I would have several days off. As if fate was the driver, I immediately checked the flights and found a ticket I could afford. I bought a one way ticket and went to visit my friend. I rented a car after landing and called to invite her for lunch! Needless to say she was shocked and delighted. We spent time together talking, eating, and catching up on each others lives. It was truly wonderful to see her and her new home.
     I had to get a flight back since I had only bought a one way ticket. When I was checking flights, it looked like it was going to be very expensive to fly home. Rather than get worried(as my dear friend suggested), I instead decided to check the morning flights. As if destined to be, there was a flight home cheaper than what it cost to fly to see her. Wow!
     Let me just say that 'listening to my inner voice and being spontaneous' left me feeling so empowered and free. It was so so good for me on every level. When was the last time you did something spontaneous? Instinctively? Have you been listening to your inner voice? Would love to hear your thoughts. Do tell...
 

Question of the Week: What gets you motivated?

Hello,
I am very excited about the opportunity to share thoughts and ideas on my new blog. I believe blogging is a great way to share experiences and discuss issues that are important about ourselves, our loved ones, and our friends.  I hope you will join me and share whatever you wish in an effort to effect communication, learning, and growth.

I would like to start this journey by having a "Question of the Week."  Please feel free to suggest questions for the upcoming weeks.

To start, the question of the week is:
                                                           What gets you motivated?




For me, there's a few things:
1.  A PopTart and a cup of coffee in the morning(don't tell my heart surgeon).
2.  A nice brisk walk with some Rolling Stones songs to 'Start Me Up,' or some Bob Dylan lyrics to ponder.
3.  Self talk for days in advance about the reason I need the motivation.
4.  And, most importantly, a conversation with my higher source.

How about you? Do tell...