Lately I've become aware of some underlying fears that are dominating my movements. I've known about these fears and have chosen to ignore them because to face them, well, then, I would have to be proactive and do something about them. Does that sound like you?
For me, I know it's time to have a look at my fears and see what can be done. In a way, doing nothing keeps me in this little sphere where I can be negative, lazy, fearsome, and changeless. A favorite excuse has been my transplant and the side effects of my medication that cause my anemia, bone loss, and digestion issues. These issues, like for many of you, are a daily occurrence for me and require a lot of energy to contend with.
'Fear' leaves us all paralyzed, and, for some odd reason, comfortable in such an ungodly place. And, while in that place, we spread our fear to our family, our friends, our neighbors, our community, and to everyone we meet. The next thing you know everybody is shifty eyed, anxious, afraid to express themselves, awkward in manner, and exhausted. I've recognized the need to express myself through thoughtful communication, confidence, eye contact, and with positive clarity. Couldn't we all benefit from that?
So what can we do? I decided to try a strategy that has worked for me in the past and I invite you to see if it will provide any benefit for you. To begin, I start by identifying each fear, becoming clear on why I have the fear, weighing the options I have to dispel the fear, and considering the consequences of any actions I may have to take. I spend time gathering information and becoming informed. Then, I talk with my coach and others about replacing my fear with something positive, workable, life-enhancing, and responsible. Then I take action and make a change.
With the process outlined above in mind, I hope dispel three of the fears that are prevalent in my life right now. I believe this is one way to try and I ask that you share what works for you.
Do tell....
3 comments:
Michelle,
I think you hit the nail right on the head. Our fears can put us in an uncomfortably comfortable position of not having to change or deal with things that are bothering us. I'm working on a career change right now and I would almost rather stay in an unsatisfactory postion than go out there, interview and risk rejection.
DP
Hi DP,
I cannot even begin to count the number of times that I felt rejected, dumb, self-conscious, and inept in the last 10 plus years. Why would anyone want to hire me or ask me for help--I mean after all--I allowed myself to get sick and then had to move back home to get the care and support I needed from my family. I felt like I lost. I still have times when I feel like I don't measure up. So, as soon as I have that thought, I change it immediately! You get better at it with practice.
DP, one thing that I know 'FOR SURE' is that when you replace those negative thoughts with affirmations, it's the beginning of a change for the better. Instead of telling yourself "you better stay where you are...,"start telling yourself "there is a world of possibilities out there and "I AM going after them." "I am strong--I am capable--I am worthy!" Start your day with positive affirmations and watch yourself come alive.
And, no matter what and I mean no matter what DO NOT STOP going for that better day. It's waiting for you.
I am calling upon all the positive forces of hope and change to enfold you as you journey into your new career. I know you can do it!!
"To the triumphant spirit,"
Michelle
Michelle,
Thank you for this strategy for dealing with fear. I will give it a try. Lately I have been harboring a lot of fear about something happening to my children. They both have life threatening nut allergies. We recently relocated and my girls are both starting new schools in a week. I have deep anxiety over whether their new schools will understand the seriousness of their condition and be vigilant enough to keep them safe. I have been loosing sleep over this and am thankful that you have offered one strategy to help deal with this kind of fear.
Jade
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